College is a whole different ball game, they say. And they weren’t lyin. This girl needs a time out. What’s with the never ending question of “have you found the one yet?” No Carol sit back down on your rocker. I haven’t. (But seriously #ringbyspring).
Anyways, let’s have a chat about the Almighty King we serve. His never failing, constant companionship is something that I fell deeper in love with in a little town called Abilene out in West Texas. Little Abilene has a lot to offer if you were born and raised in a city similar to itself, the back roads, the limited choice of eateries, and of course the lake. For this girl, it’s Heaven on earth.
Small town vibes run through my veins. The second I stepped foot onto the campus I knew I was home, cliche right? But it’s true. Something inside me just knew that this place was where I was going to further my career, grow my faith in the Lord, make life long friends, and hopefully meet the one I will spend the rest of my life with. (Yes Carol, there’s still hope).
I was confident in the fact that the Lord had placed me here for a purpose and continued to praise Him for that in the days to come. Now that I’ve painted a beautiful picture of my first encounters with college, let’s talk about the rainy Friday afternoon where God was no where to be seen (or so I thought).
I had just finished one of my hardest exams of the week and was feeling confident, then the sweet little ding of my phone rang through the air alerting me that the grades were in. Don’t you just love how technology doesn’t hesitate to let you know the good, the bad, and the ugly? Anyway, my parade was quickly rained on (and literally, thanks Abilene for the random downpours) as I walked up the steep steps of the College of Business. “I thought I aced it. That was the easiest one.”, my mind began to race back to the days and weeks (okay weeks may be a stretch but you get the gist) I poured over that textbook and learned every term down to “entrepreneurship”, basic. I passed. However, not with flying colors I was expecting.
I began to question everything. And friend, when I say everything, I mean from the shoes I chose to wear that day to the career path I was on was where I was supposed to be. Call me dramatic, but it happened.
Panic set in. Then came the anxiety and over thinking. And then came the tears. All in the matter of time it takes a Tea 2 Go addicted girl to get from campus to the Tea place across town.
Staring blankly out the window and sipping my tea it hit me. It’s going to be okay. (Cause about 10 minutes before that if you had tried to tell me that, I would’ve probably throat punched you and told you about how crazy you were forever uttering those words).
I started to explain to my sweet friend my concerns, and as a friend gifted with the ability to comfort she asked if I had expressed these things to the Lord. Hesitantly I admitted, no. I turned to Him in times of rejoicing and gratefulness, but for some reason it made sense in my head to turn to myself in times of trouble. Again, my friend broke into my daydream and said “abbs, we’ve all been there but I think you’ll find a lot more peace if you look to God instead of taking it all on yourself”. Thanks sweet girl, your next tea is on me.
Anyways, putting my stubborn pride aside, it was time for a come to Jesus meeting. Literally. I spilled my guts to the Ultimate Listener. My concerns, my worries, my fears that I DID in fact wear the wrong shoes to the exam. Everything? He heard it. But, I was not ready for Him to answer me THAT fast.
Luckily that evening we attended this worship service put on by ACU called Midnight Worship. I almost talked myself out of not going and just going to sleep, because I was in fact exhausted. But I compromised and just took a quick nap. (Because what college kid goes to sleep at a decent hour? Ever? It’s just wrong.) I walked into the auditorium expecting to just go through the motions of singing and putting on a fake smile. However, the Lord had other plans.
Instantly, I was greeted a wave of laughter and chatter from my fellow Wildcats, which very swiftly was followed by a wave of relief. As my Momma always says “it was totally the Holy Spirit”.
As my friends and I settled into our spots we began worshiping our Lord, each song felt as if they were written just for me in my very moment. Do you ever feel that way? Like when you’re drivin’ down the highway and a song takes you back to an exact memory or maybe a worship song comes on and you’re like “whoa okay Lord, I hear ya!” Yeah, that was me at that very moment, completely floored by the power of our King.
At one point I remember just standing there, not singing, not looking around, just fully embracing the Lord’s presence. Friend, if that won’t set you in your place I don’t know what will. Eventually, the hour of worship ended and we all ended up at What-A-Burger. A room full of laughing and friendships always fill this extroverts soul to the very top. It was a great night that ended with cookie dough and a “Friends” marathon with one of my girls.
So this college thing as a whole can be a whirlwind. Sometimes you forget to change out of your jammies to go to your morning classes, but hey we’ve all been there. God’s sense of humor will never fail to keep me giggling. From the silly girl drama, to the hot headed boys who still have yet to figure out my worth (stay tuned Carol, I’m sure I’ll find one eventually), to the moments it feels as though He enjoys watching me run around like a chicken with its head cut off. He is faithful, even in the quiet hours He’s still there. You just have to stop using your outside voice in this big world to hear His whisper.
xoxo, A